If you’ve ever thought to yourself, “One of these days people will realise I don’t know as much as they think,” then you are in excellent company! You’re going to be found out.
I’d wake up in the morning before going off to write an article, compose some sounds in my computer or just organise my day and think, I can’t do this. All I can see is everything I’m doing wrong that is a negative or not right. And that is the impostor syndrome. The feeling when you think what you truly do is right in your passion, it immediately swaps in your mind like a bi-polar. A switch from positive to negative, at a fast speed.
Have you been there? I’ve been. Not that long ago I was a victim to this syndrome. A genuine failure. Wile the rest remains just an unfortunate story, somewhere sad and somewhere with a feel of sorry in a time when the beginning started to flourish..let’s say was just a story.
But needless to say, the list of people who sometimes worry about being uncovered as an impostor is as impressive as it is long. Having to live with a nagging fear of being “found out” as not being as smart or talented or deserving or experienced or anything else, as people think is a common phenomenon.
Living in a world of billions of humans is hard to make decisions that you are that good or not from A or B. Apart from serial narcissists, super low achievers and outright crazies, no one is immune to the self-doubt that feeds Impostor Syndrome.
I use to wake up in the morning, take a pen and a paper, write for 10 hours non stop then bin the all scrip by saying ”I can’t do this, there are better writers than me, I will never make it, It will never happen, no one will pay attention to my words, I am a piece of crap” and that was me saying to my self. A solo life in an Impostor Syndrome. And then I said to my self ‘ I got this’ I will just make my mess a message”. And you know what? I’ve realised that we all bullshitting out our way thru life. Period.
And what matters most is not whether we occasionally (or regularly) fear failing, looking foolish or not being whatever enough it’s whether we give those fears the power to keep us from taking the actions needed to achieve our goals and highest aspirations. Unfortunately, too often people do just that. And they just don’t acknowledge it.
Can you focus on the value you bring and not on attaining perfection?
Impostor Syndrome is the domain of the high achiever. Those who set the bar low are rarely it’s victim. So if you are relating to what I’m sharing, then pat yourself on the back because it’s a sure sign that you aren’t ready to settled into the ranks of mediocrity. Rather, you’re likely to be a person who aims high and is committed to giving your very best to whatever endeavour you set your sights upon in your life. A noble aim to be sure.
Giving your best is not the same as being the best. I wrote about this in a previous article ‘ The Competitive Generation ‘ but likewise, there’s a distinct difference between trying to better yourself and being better than every one else.
Overcoming the Imposter Syndrome requires self-acceptance.
You don’t have to attain perfection or mastery to be worthy of the success you’ve achieved and any accolades or whatever you name it, you earn that along the way. It’s not about lowering the bar, it’s about resetting it to a realistic level that doesn’t leave you forever striving and feeling inadequate.
And you know what? You don’t have to be Einstein to be a valuable asset to your organization and to those around you or those who you want to impress around you. Nor do you have to attain perfection to share something with the world that enriches people’s lives in some way. But I do recommend scoring your self with a V.R.I.N score now and then. If you don’t know or never heard of it give it a search on internet, you may find it interesting it’s meaning. Not the internet..haha
I am about to finish writing thirteen books by 2027, (Yes I know is quote some time but 9 years can flourish it’s glow) but each time I think, ‘uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve had a crush on my school mate when I was 14, and they’re going to find me out and I was adopted and I never know my parents’ Who cares. Fortunately I will never let my fear of being ‘found out’ stoping me from putting pen to paper and sharing thoughts that will expand people hearts and enriched others lives with the value I will put out.
Own your successes. You didn’t get lucky by chance. And you only have a life not one and a half.
Those who often fear being “found out” have a tendency to attribute their success to external factors – like luck or a helping hand. Unsurprisingly, women tend to do this more often than men who are are more likely to attribute their successes to a combination of internal factors, such as grit, talent, brains and sheer hard work.
There are an awful lot of people out there who think B or A is an expert. How do these people believe all this about A or B? Is A or B so much aware of all the things don’t know? And this was an example of thinking from a high achiever and how tend to focus more on what they haven’t done versus what they have. Trust me, I interview so many on this subject.
If you sometimes feel undeserving of your success, try writing a list of all the key things you’ve accomplished over the last 5 years just if you sometimes feel undeserving of your success. It works.
Cease comparisons. They’re an act violence against oneself
Comparisons are always subjective, often biased and rarely helpful. Acutely aware of how hard we’re working to keep our head above water and fulfil expectations, we often mistakenly assume others are getting by more effortlessly. The reality is that many many people are stretched and struggling just like you my love. Perhaps not in the same way, but in their own way, with their own unique set of challenges, insecurities and internal struggles.
Too often we fall into the trap of comparing our insides with others outsides. And I’ve been there. I use to buy things, wear things, listen to things, watch things and much more just because A or B was doing the same and then I realised I was subjective just like the masses in everything I was doing. In one word’ I was thinking distorted’
Hold firm to ambition.
Fear of being “found out” can sabotage success on multiple fronts as it drives us to settle for less than we want and steer a wide berth from situations that might expose our inadequacy and unworthiness. While playing safe removes the immediate risk of exposure, it opens up the greater risk of never knowing just how capable, deserving and more than worthy you truly are.
I write my Articles now quite often and I get once in a wile emails from A or B with this multiple subjectives opinions. ” Well, in a few years when my career will flourish, you will be still flipping burgers on minimum wage. To your success”. And thats my short email responded back.
It takes damn courage to take on challenges and pursue aspirations that leave you wide open to falling short, losing face and being ‘found out.’ But when you refuse to let your doubts dictate your choices, you open new doors of opportunity and discover just how much you can really do and your truly worthy skill.
Even if you never accomplish all you aspire toward, you will accomplish so much more than you otherwise would have. In the process you’ll come to realise that the only impostor you ever had to worry about is your fear of people thinking you are one.
And so leave others flip their burgers for the rest of their life, and just flip your own way in life. Your Impostor Syndrome Stoped Here.
TO YOUR SUCCES!!!
Here’s my ask.
Just let me know how I can help you. If you’ve been reading this blog, and you think there’s something I can give you some advice or direction on, hit me up.
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